If you ask a lot of people what they want in life, they say, 'Oh, just to be happy I guess. ' same goes if you ask what they want for their children, ' I don't mind what they do as long as they are happy.'
Happiness is such an illusory thing that spending too much time chasing it is not very worthwhile. People think they'll be happy on holiday when they mean relaxed or stimulated or freed from their cares..and indeed they are. Aiming for happiness is one of those 'bigger is best' things. Instead of aiming for happy, it's better to aim for contentment...sure that's attainable and of a worthy goal.
This applies especially to relationships - both to the quest to find Mr or Mrs right and in what happens when you do. Most of us want to fall madly head over heels in love. Big chemistry - fireworks, unbelievable feelings. It's wonderful! It's extreme. But that intensity can't and won't last.
Contentment is what you hope for after things has worn off. And so if you find you are with somebody where there is no big firework display and extreme of feelings but there's a baseline contentment of warmth and love - be happy with that.
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